Find , Fall And Stay In Love

What after walking up the aisle? Can marriage suffer burnout?Like all relationships,putting the romance back into marriage requires energy,devotion and being there for each other through foul and good weather.Here are three lighthouses to look out for:

TOUCH - Babies crying their hearts out aren't doing so to want a chat.He or she wants to be held and patted.Something basic, primitive: human touch,contact.Adults need this physical contact as well.They need to cuddle together for warmth and comfort in an indifferent,cold world,almost loveless world.A man and a woman can do that for each other.Touching each other in open ways leads on to touching mind and hearts as well.Do whatever it takes to make a connection,to make your spouse feel loved,secure,cared,respected in the relationship.

TALK - Small talk,chats,talking to each other must be fought for and persevered in.The man can tell his woman something he has done without fearing repercussions or that he is blowing his trumpets.He can count on her interest,support and understanding.If you will be away,if even for a day make sure he/she hears your voice at least.

SERVE - A woman serves the man's need to be needed.If no one needs you what good are you?Others- friends,employers,business partners,acquaintances may swear they need you.But as far as they are concerned or your place in these relationships are replaceable.To your spouse you are not replaceable at any price.That should flood you with the sort of feelings and self esteem you need to meet the world everyday.A spouse feels great to know, to be made known to. that he or she is No 1 in the partner's life.We do not have a choice in arriving and exiting from this life, so make the best of the lemons or the roses.

Any love that lasts becomes a love story.Marriage is a story of sharing.Partners grow and share because they know they are on the boat,journey together against the whole world.A wonderful marriage spills over into the childrens' lives,quietly letting them know that it's a story to be continued..by them.

But one thing you have a great deal of responsibility over, is the family coffer - the most threatened platform and fabric of married life today.Here's a pioneer's trail.

Pioneer A Trail

The Family

The family today is an assaulted,wounded institution.As far back as one can look back into dim history, how we order our loyalties depends on the ageless bonds of family life. Significant,sudden changes are destroying families like as had never been before . Cohabitation, gay,lesbian and divorce are it's greatest enemies.

The removal of legal and moral shame from cohabitation,divorce, homosexuality etc etc has not made the worlds of our lives safer or unchanged.The gradual keeling over by which lesbianism etc became immorality and immorality went on to become deviance and deviance is choice and choice assumes legitamateship has torn lives to shreds.

Whatever happened to stable nuclear families?The family is that cradle in which with supportive sources of love and loyalty we work out a sense of who we are.It is the place where one's individuality blooms.Our sense of right and wrong and our moral values came out of life in a family.It is where we care for others,for dependents:loved ones,young,old,widows,orphans and strangers ( in an extended family).The family is the cradle of history,where traditions,heroic struggles and the adventures of kith and kin have been handed down from generation to generation.The place where individual histories have been kept alive.A collective memory knits brothers and sisters together.Family life was where our moral world came into being and nurtured.This moral structure lies behind our idea of individual freedoms,social ties and every other relationship.

Without the family nest,with our modern ideas of abstract individualism,with no limits on what one can choose or unchoose to do the family is getting relegated to unnecessary.Should family life disintegrate?At the heart of all our sensibilities is family life.Lose it and we will lose much more.

Cally Rao

Family Life

picture credit : illustrationsof.com